Gun Porn
I need to preface today's post with a bit of a story as to my day yesterday.
For various reasons, all of which have four legs, I had to do some major repairs to the chain-link fence in my back yard. Bear in mind, I'm no handy-man and all I know about tools is which end of a claw-hammer to bury in a person's skull. As a result, I've transformed my hands into something resembling ground-beef with cuticles.
So, as a way of dealing with some annoyingly persistent pain, I went to the movies last night. I decided I was in the mood for something tremendously mindless, so I chose Shoot 'Em Up.
How to best describe this film?
Well, to call it a typical gun-porn movie (meaning a film where a lot of people shoot each other over an incredibly thin plot pulling off physically impossible shots, etc.) would be accurate, but it wouldn't even be telling a quarter of the story.
Shoot 'Em Up takes the gun-porn genre to a level that even the most dedicated 13 year old boy in the grips of a rampage brought on by 8 litres of Mountain Dew and 14 hours of Halo 2 would find ludicrous.
The film not only doesn't take itself too seriously, it goes out of its way to make you laugh; not with it, but at it. The entire plot (which I won't divulge here) could probably be described in less time than it would take to replace a toilet roll, but that doesn't matter, and Shoot 'Em Up seems perfectly fine with that. In fact, it revels in it's thin plot and outlandish gun-play.
Nothing I type here will do the film justice without spoiling some of it, and most people wouldn't see it otherwise, so I will have to put forth some minor spoilers here.
In this film, no fewer than people people are killed with carrots sticks. Guns are used, not just to kill people, but to open doors, work a playground merry-go-round, and even to cut an umbilical chord.
Trust me, go see Shoot 'Em Up even if you don't normally enjoy gun-porn, you'll love this one because of it.
For various reasons, all of which have four legs, I had to do some major repairs to the chain-link fence in my back yard. Bear in mind, I'm no handy-man and all I know about tools is which end of a claw-hammer to bury in a person's skull. As a result, I've transformed my hands into something resembling ground-beef with cuticles.
So, as a way of dealing with some annoyingly persistent pain, I went to the movies last night. I decided I was in the mood for something tremendously mindless, so I chose Shoot 'Em Up.
How to best describe this film?
Well, to call it a typical gun-porn movie (meaning a film where a lot of people shoot each other over an incredibly thin plot pulling off physically impossible shots, etc.) would be accurate, but it wouldn't even be telling a quarter of the story.
Shoot 'Em Up takes the gun-porn genre to a level that even the most dedicated 13 year old boy in the grips of a rampage brought on by 8 litres of Mountain Dew and 14 hours of Halo 2 would find ludicrous.
The film not only doesn't take itself too seriously, it goes out of its way to make you laugh; not with it, but at it. The entire plot (which I won't divulge here) could probably be described in less time than it would take to replace a toilet roll, but that doesn't matter, and Shoot 'Em Up seems perfectly fine with that. In fact, it revels in it's thin plot and outlandish gun-play.
Nothing I type here will do the film justice without spoiling some of it, and most people wouldn't see it otherwise, so I will have to put forth some minor spoilers here.
In this film, no fewer than people people are killed with carrots sticks. Guns are used, not just to kill people, but to open doors, work a playground merry-go-round, and even to cut an umbilical chord.
Trust me, go see Shoot 'Em Up even if you don't normally enjoy gun-porn, you'll love this one because of it.
1 Comments:
Oh goody. Another film I can tease Brian about when it shows up on our pay per view cable bill in a few months.
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